I'm Not A Teen Mom
by animedude16
Summary: Temari's life wasn't very special. She spent most of her time babysitting her niece Izumi. If she went out, it was only with her friend Sakura. Her life was simple you could say. That all changes when the guy she happens to like thinks she is a teen mom... Life sucked ass.
1. Chapter 1

**It's been awhile since I wrote anything :P I blame laziness. Plus I'm volunteering at an animal hospital and that takes up a lot of my time. I helped with a C-section :D it was so cool and a great experience! So I'm not entirely sure how I came up with this…music seems to give me more ideas for new stories or one shots but it doesn't help me finish my other stories -_- those of you waiting for Blazing Sun I'm soo sorry! I have about half the chapter done but I can't seem to finish it . So without any more of my rambling here's the one shot!**

**Disclaimer: we all know I don't own Naruto so moving on**

It was a Thursday night and Temari was once again stuck at home babysitting. Her brother was working late, or so he said, leaving Temari to babysit her niece. Temari knows her brother intentionally gives her babysitting duty so she won't go out. Even if all she wants to do is go to the movies with her good friend Sakura. Stupid overprotective brother.

Temari sighs and lies on her stomach. She is currently on the couch with her niece. Sesame Street was playing on the TV and Temari was ready to stab her eyes out. Her niece was in love with this show especially Elmo. Her niece's eyes were glued to the screen. Her niece, Izumi, was a handful and mischievous just like her dad. She got her dad's brown hair and colored eyes from uncle Gaara, just a shade darker. At the age of one, Izumi is much smarter than she should be. So Temari has to keep her in her sight otherwise she'll do something that will give Temari a heart attack. Last time Temari took her eyes of Izumi for 10 seconds and when she looked back Izumi was sitting on top the dining table playing with a butter knife.

Elmo appears on the TV and Izumi smiles and claps her hands. Temari groans and covers her head with a cushion. Izumi sees this and assumes her aunty is sleeping. She does not like that at all. She crawls over to her aunt and begins to hit her back. Temari removes the cushion "stop it."

Izumi laughs and jumps onto her aunty Temari's back. The rest of the night was like any other night. Izumi watched Elmo on Netflix for hours while Temari cursed the people who created the show. Then when it got late Temari filled Izumi's drinking cup with milk, turned off all the lights, and went to bed. Of course Izumi never went to sleep when Temari wanted. Kankuro would come home late and would peek in his sister's room to make sure his angle and sister were fast asleep. The cycle continues and only changes when Kankuro has a day off.

Friday morning comes faster than Temari wanted. When her phone alarm goes off Temari groans. Quickly turning off the alarm Temari continues to lie in bed, not ready to leave the warmth. Of course she didn't lie in the comfort of her bed too long, she knew if she didn't get up now she'll be late to school. Temari gets ready as quietly as possible. When she's done Temari walks in her brother's room.

"Kankuro" a grunt was her response.

"I'm leaving. Izumi is still asleep in my room."

He didn't respond, most likely didn't know Temari was talking to him. Temari sighs and leaves his room. After checking to make sure Izumi was asleep, Temari leaves the apartment and walks to school. While walking she sends a text message to Kankuro telling him she left and that his kid was asleep in her room. After a 15 minute walk Temari arrives at school. She goes to her locker where she spots her pink haired friend Sakura.

"Morning Temari" Sakura greets with a smile.

"I hate mornings."

Sakura rolls her eyes "you hate every morning."

"I'm not a morning person. Thank God it's Friday."

"Who isn't glad that it's Friday?"

"People who like school" Temari pokes Sakura in the stomach.

Sakura swats her hand away "hey I happen to like Fridays too."

"Suuure you do."

Sakura sticks her tongue out and Temari smirks. "Shouldn't you save that for Sasuke?"

Sakura punches Temari's arm "you know our relationship is complicated."

Temari rubs her sore arm "so you take it out on me? Jesus that hurt."

"That's what you get for bringing it up."

"I was kidding yet you go Hulk on me."

"Do you want another bruise on your other arm?" Sakura threatens

"This is bullying I'm calling the cops."

"Ha ha you're hilarious."

Temari winks "I try."

The bell rings and all the students begin to walk to their class. "Alright Sasuke lover I'll see you third period."

"Your arm is now a target."

Classes were uneventful but Sakura did punch Temari again during third period. Lunch time came and Temari couldn't be happier, she was starving. She waited impatiently for Sakura at her locker. She spots short pink hair running in her direction. Before Temari could ask anything, or demand food, Sakura gives her a bone crushing hug.

"I c-can't breathe!" Temari manages to yell out

"Sorry!" Sakura quickly lets go.

"I'm reporting this as domestic violence. I think you broke a rib or two."

"You won't believe what just happened!"

"Something good otherwise I wouldn't have received your hug."

"Sasuke asked me out!"

Temari blinks. She takes a minute to let the information sink in. Looking at Sakura's smiling face makes Temari confused. "How the hell is that a good thing? I thought you hated him after he rejected you sophomore year."

"I do" Sakura is still smiling but has a mischievous gleam in her eyes.

Noticing this Temari eyes her warily "what the hell are you planning?"

"First let's get lunch and I'll explain my plan."

"After that hug I don't think I'm hungry anymore."

Sakura rolls her eyes "you not hungry that's a laugh."

"Shut up Sasuke lover."

The two girls make their way to the lunch line and get pizza. Sakura drags Temari to a grassy area where she's sure no one will hear them. They sit on the ground and Sakura begins to explain her plan while Temari is busy eating her food.

"Sasuke asked me out after fourth period was over."

Temari raises an eyebrow and gives her a look that says 'just like that?'

Sakura shrugs "ya I don't know why he did it either. I mean we haven't talked much since sophomore year."

"After he rejected you."

"Which you kindly keep reminding me." Sakura scowls

"Sorry. Continue."

"Anyway after he asked me out I said no."

Temari chokes on her pizza. Sakura is quick to slap her on the back. When Temari recovers she stares at her friend, "what do you mean you said no?"

"If you let me finish the story I would explain everything."

"Well excuse me for interrupting. It's not every day you hear someone refusing a date with Uchiha."

"I only refused because I wanted him to have a taste of his own medicine."

"So why did you give me a bone crushing hug if you rejected him?"

"Well I may have hinted that I would only go if you were there."

Temari glares "like hell I'm going to be a third wheel."

"I know you won't and Sasuke knows that too."

"So why the hell were you so happy?"

"Sasuke asked me out and I said no. I feel awesome!"

Temari stares at Sakura like you would a crazy person. "You're insane you know that?"

"Right now I don't care. I'm in a great mood!"

The rest of the day was like a normal day. No one but a select few knew about Sakura rejecting Sasuke. So it wasn't made a big deal. When school was over Temari congratulated Sakura for rejecting Sasuke before walking home. Once she got home she found her brother Gaara playing blocks with Izumi.

"Hey bro what are you doing here?"

"Kankuro went to get burgers and I stayed."

"Mama!" Izumi runs and hugs Temari's legs.

Temari smiles at her niece before detangling herself from her grip. Izumi goes back to play with her uncle while Temari walks into her room. She throws her backpack down and takes off her shoes. She changes into a pair of grey sweat pants and a white tank top. She returns to the living room and lies on the couch.

As soon as Temari got comfortable there was banging at the door. "Temari get it."

"I just got comfortable Gaara. You get it."

"I'm busy."

"You're closer."

"Get off your lazy ass."

"Hey you can't curse if front of her you idiot."

"Answer-"

Sakura barrels through the door "we have a problem!"

"Other than the fact you might have broken the door" Gaara rolls his eyes

"I'm kidnaping Temari!" Sakura grabs Temari's arm and drags her out the apartment.

"Wait Sakura I'm bare-"

"No time! It's an emergency!"

Sakura pushes Temari into her car then runs to the driver's side. Sakura quickly drives to her house, drags Temari into her house, then into her room. Sakura slams her bedroom door shut and Temari glares "dude what the hell!?"

"We have a major situation here!"

"I do too. Izumi is probably crying her eyes out and Gaara is most likely panicking!"

"Listen to me-"

"No you listen; you can't just drag people out of their homes! Kankuro is-"

"We have a double date tomorrow!"

"And I'm barefoot yet you still drag me out of my own apartment."

Sakura grabs Temari by her shoulders. "Listen to the words I'm about to say. We. Have. A. Double. Date. Tomorrow."

"Sakura you have 10 seconds to explain yourself before I kill you."

Sakura groans and throws herself on her bed. "Sasuke found me after you left and asked me out again."

Temari sits on the foot of the bed. "Wow twice in one day. That has to be a record."

"Can you not joke for like 5 minutes?"

"Fine start explaining."

"I was in my car when Sasuke tapped on the window. The second I rolled down the window he said 'movies tomorrow at 6 bring Temari.' Then the bastard walked away!"

Despite this being a serious situation, for Sakura, Temari couldn't help but laugh. Sakura throws her pillow at her, "this isn't funny!"

"You have to admit it's a little funny."

"How are you still my friend?"

"No idea but I'm not going."

"You can't leave me alone!"

"And I'm not going out with a random person" Temari crosses her arms.

"It's one of his friend's not a random person."

"Still not going."

"Temari please! Wait what if it's Shikamaru going?"

"Who cares if that lazy ass is going?"

"I know you like him" Sakura nudges Temari with her foot.

"I do not and don't touch me with your shoe."

Sakura sits up "you two like each other but are too stubborn to admit it."

Temari glares "I don't like him."

Sakura shrugs "ok you don't. So it shouldn't bother you that I saw him talking to Shiho."

"N-No I don't care."

Sakura noticed the irritation in Temari's voice and smirks. "Looked like she was making a move."

Temari crosses her arms "still don't care."

"Saw them walking away and looked like she was going to grab his hand."

"…..that little bitch."

"Ha! I knew it." Sakura smiles triumphantly

"I hate you so much right now." Temari glares at Sakura

"You are a life saver" Sakura gives Temari another bone crushing hug

"Stop with the hugs!" Temari tries to pry Sakura's arms off.

Sakura let's go and rushes to her closet. "What the hell am I going to wear?!"

Temari rubs her aching sides while glaring at Sakura "I don't care. Now take me home."

"Nope we're going to the mall."

"Are you deaf? What part I'm barefoot do you not understand?"

"It's almost 4 and the mall closes at 10. That's should be enough time for the both of us to find something."

"Sakura!"

"Or maybe I should-"

"Pinky!"

Sakura looks at Temari with an eyebrow raised, "did you say something?"

Temari's eye twitches "take me home now before I abandon you tomorrow."

Sakura pouts "but what am I going to wear?"

Temari groans "I don't know but you can call me for advice. Look I have to get back home before Izumi's crying makes Gaara kill someone, aka me."

Sakura sighs "alright fine I'll take you home."

"Good because being barefoot in someone else's house is really weird."

Sakura looks surprised "you're barefoot?"

"…..take me home now."

When Temari got home she had to cheer up a crying Izumi then was given a lecture by Gaara and Kankuro. Saying things like "you can't just run off like that" "Izumi was crying her eyes out" and "why would you leave my baby alone with Gaara!" Temari explained that Sakura was worried about a date they had for Saturday. Her brothers' reactions were confused expressions and asked "you like girls?"

Temari punched her brothers on the head which amused Izumi greatly. Temari then said she and Sakura had a double date with two guys they knew from school. She didn't give names because Temari knew her brothers would find out where they lived and "convince" the guys to cancel the date. It took 20 minutes before Temari managed to convince her brothers to let her go to the movies on Saturday.

The next day Sakura was having a complete panic attack by 4 p.m. Temari was trying very hard to be patient with Sakura. This proved much harder than Temari thought.

"Sakura who cares what you wear, you don't like him anymore remember?"

"_I know but I still want to wear something cute so Sasuke can see what he can't have."_

"Then do that."

"_What do you think I've been trying to do for the past hour?!"_

"Annoying me."

"_Ha ha __funny__. __Anyway are you getting ready yet?"_

"Not yet. If I get ready too soon Izumi is gonna get me dirty."

"_Ok well you're no help. I'm gonna hop in the shower and see if I can think of an outfit to wear."_

"Good luck with that."

"_See you at the movies."_

Temari places her phone on her dresser before deciding she should shower. She grabs her necessities and heads for the bathroom. As soon as she shuts the door Izumi starts banging on the door. When Temari turned on the shower, Izumi's banging got louder and she began to cry. Temari sighs and opens the door.

Izumi walks in and slams the door shut. Temari shakes her head, "well looks like you're taking a shower."

Temari takes a quick shower but leaves the water running a little longer so Izumi could play. When she is done playing, Temari wraps herself and Izumi in a towel and goes to her room to change. For the meantime Temari just puts on a diaper for Izumi while she looks through her closet to find something decent to put on.

While Temari was looking through her closet, and throwing many pieces of clothing to the ground, Kankuro yells out "I'm leaving!"

Temari opens her door enough to stick her head out. "Where are you going?"

"Got called in to work today."

"Wait Kankuro I have a-"

"Take care of my baby. Bye Izumi!"

"Kankuro wait!"

Kankuro already left the apartment and into his car. Temari stood there dumbfounded. Sakura was going to kill her. Temari bangs her head against the door "crap."

Izumi tugs on the towel "mama?"

Temari sighs "no use getting dressed anymore."

It was around five fifty when Sakura called in panic mode. _"Where the hell are you?"_

"Kankuro ditched me and left me babysitting again. So I can't go."

"_WHAT?!"_

Temari flinches "I think you just blew up my ear drum."

"_You can't do this to me!"_

"This wasn't my choice."

"_What about Gaara? Can't he watch her?"_

"One I've already told you Gaara can't watch Izumi for more than 2 hours by himself. He'll kill someone. Two he started dating this chick so no."

"_What the hell am I supposed to do?"_

"You're the smart one. Figure something out."

"_Sasuke is going to think I made this up."_

"What, me stuck babysitting?"

"_Yes!"_

"Well it's the truth. I can tell him if he wants."

"_That's perfect! I'll give my phone to Sasuke."_

"Hang on Sakura someone's at the door."

Sakura didn't hear the last part; she is quick to give her phone to Sasuke. Temari went to answer the door but left her phone on the couch. Izumi dropped her toy so she could play with her aunt's phone. Seeing her aunty and dad use the phone often, Izumi knew the phone was used to talk to people. She even knew where it went and how to hold it.

Izumi places the phone to her ear, upside down, and starts talking. Sasuke thinking it was Temari didn't understand what was being said.

"_Listen Temari this better not be a plan you came up with Sakura. Start talking right."_

Hearing her auntie's name Izumi smiles, "mama! Go! One two…five…" Izumi continued to babble on.

"_The hell? Temari are you talking? Who is this?" _Sasuke heard a door slam and someone yell "Izumi I'm going to murder your dad!"

Before Sasuke could demand what was going on the line cut.

~ Monday ~

Temari just arrived at school and was not in a good mood. She felt bad for leaving Sakura alone with Uchiha and his friend on Saturday. She was pissed at her brother for ditching her at home with his kid. The asshole didn't have to work he went out with some of his friends, and Gaara was there too! Her brothers couldn't let her have one day to try and enjoy her life. She loved Izumi with all her heart but sometimes she hated getting stuck with babysitting.

Temari is slowly walking to her locker when she spots Shikamaru walking in her direction. Well that was weird. Usually Temari didn't see him until second period. Shikamaru stops in front of her, "hey."

"Hey"

They stood staring at each other. Temari wasn't sure what to say. She didn't even know what Shikamaru wanted. The silence started to get awkward. Temari decided if she didn't break the ice then they would keep staring at each other until the bell rang.

"So how was your weekend? Spent it sleeping?"

Shikamaru shrugs "it was ok. Was supposed to watch a movie on Saturday with Sasuke but since Sakura's friend didn't show the date was canceled."

Temari laughs nervously "sorry to hear that."

"So why couldn't you make it?"

Temari crosses her arms "how do you know I was the friend?"

"You're Sakura's best friend."

"That means nothing."

"We both know if you're not there Sakura wouldn't be in the same area with Sasuke."

"Well why do you care if I wasn't there?"

Shikamaru blushes a little "no reason. Just curious."

"Well if you must know I got stuck babysitting."

"Sasuke said something about that. He was talking to a little girl thinking it was you."

"Really?"

"Yea apparently she was counting."

Temari smiles slightly "she only knows three numbers. One two and five."

Shikamaru scratches the back of his head "so how old is she?"

"One. Her birthday is in three months."

"That's nice."

Before another awkward silence fell Temari says "see you second period" then starts walking away. She takes a few steps when Shikamaru grabs her wrist. Temari looks up surprised and sees that Shikamaru is blushing.

"I just want you to know that I don't see you differently."

"What?"

"I know girls aren't seen nicely when they um you know have a kid at our age."

"Ya a lot are seen as sluts or dumb. Society isn't very nice." Temari didn't understand why Shikamaru was telling her this.

"I'm not judging you because of that."

"Because of wha-" Temari's eyes grew wide in realization.

Holy crap…

Shikamaru thought….

She

Was

A

Teen

Mom?

What the fuck?! Temari was completely horrified! Temari couldn't believe Shikamaru thought she had a kid. Why the hell did he think that? Temari was slowly having a break down. Shikamaru didn't seem to notice and kept talking, but Temari wasn't listening to a word he was saying.

To save herself from any more embarrassment or before she did something crazy, Temari snatches her wrist back and runs.

Temari decided to skip school for that day. She didn't care she just needed time by herself. She didn't know where she was going she just kept walking.

Yup her life was now ruined. Life officially sucked ass.

Temari wondered around for about 15 minutes before she found a bus bench and sat down. She couldn't believe her luck. The only guy she happens to like a little thinks she's a teen mom. Temari wanted to scream but settled for glaring at anyone who walked by.

She sat there and watched people and cars go by. She was lost in her thoughts that she didn't notice Sakura's car pull up. It wasn't until Sakura blocked her vision did Temari notice her.

"You gave me a damn heart attack!"

Temari glares "I don't give a flying fuck."

"Don't take it out on me."

"No one told you to find me."

"I'm your friend you idiot!"

"Do I look like I care?"

"How the hell have you been my friend this long?!"

"If I'm so bad then run back to Ino!"

They stood glaring at each other before Sakura sighed. "What's wrong?"

Temari looks away and sits back down "go away."

Sakura sits next to her "Shikamaru told me he was talking to you but then you left like a bat out of hell."

"It's his stupid fault."

"What did he say?"

Temari groans but looks at Sakura "he thinks Izumi is my kid."

Sakura blinks a few times "he thinks you're a mom?"

Temari nods and Sakura starts laughing. Temari's face turns red from anger and embarrassment. She stands and quickly walks away from Sakura. She didn't make it very far. Sakura runs in front of her, "I'm sorry."

Temari scowls "no you're not."

"I'm sorry I laughed but it's a little funny."

"How is any of this funny?!"

"We have the worst luck with guys."

Temari groans "life sucks."

Sakura pats her shoulder sympathetically "a lot worse could happen."

"Thanks for the pep talk."

"Come on let's go to the movies then we can get ice cream."

"You're going to ditch school?"

"Hey my friend needs cheering up. Since I'm so awesome and I have a car let's just go do whatever the hell we want."

Temari stares at Sakura in disbelief. After a few moments Temari cracks a smile "Sasuke demanded another date?"

"Ugh! I don't want to talk about the asshole right now!"

Temari laughs "I thought so."

**This was originally going to be a one shot but it was getting too long so I decided to make it a two shot instead. Let me know your thoughts with a review! Thanks for reading :D remember reviews are awesome and all with get a cookie if you review ^_^**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you everyone who reviewed/favored/followed and all that good stuff :D I'm glad many of you enjoy the story so far. So here is the next chapter**

**Disclaimer: only own my new printer that I had to buy since my old one decided not to work anymore :P**

Temari and Sakura spent all of Friday trying to forget the horrible luck they have with men. They went to the movies to watch The Heat, went to eat after, and then hung out at the mall. Temari returned home at around 7 to a very messy apartment. Not in the mood to deal with the mess or her brother, Temari locks herself in her room. Izumi demanded love from her aunty but Temari tuned her out by listening to music. It might have seemed mean that Temari was ignoring her niece, but she was still angry about the events that happened earlier in the day.

Temari only opened the door for her niece when it was time to go to sleep. Izumi always sleeps with her aunty and would be up all night if she didn't sleep next to her mother figure. Temari was glad that tomorrow was Saturday. She didn't have to see Shikamaru and she could ignore her brother all weekend by locking herself in her room and listening to some very loud music.

Saturday morning came around and Temari did her usual routine. Izumi woke her up by putting her drinking cup in her face and demanding milk. Temari changed her diaper and put Izumi in her high chair so she could have breakfast. Kankuro had the day off today but Temari wasn't feeling generous so she made herself and Izumi cereal. Temari then put on Sesame Street on for Izumi. When Kankuro came out of his room Temari decided to start ignoring him for the day. It was working well until around 2 p.m. when Kankuro started banging on her door. Unfortunately Temari couldn't ignore the excess banging; he might break it down, and opens her door.

"What?"

"What crawled up your butt and died?"

Temari rolls her eyes "what do you want Kankuro?"

"We're out of food."

Temari raises an eyebrow "and?"

"Cut the attitude alright? We're going food shopping so get Izumi ready for me."

Temari finally snapped. Kankuro pushed her over the edge. It's no fucking wonder Shikamaru and probably Sasuke thought she had a kid. She acted too much like a mother! Temari grab an outfit for Izumi and threw it in Kankuro's face. Along with Izumi's diaper bag, diapers, and diaper wipes. Kankuro was lucky Izumi had her drinking cup or Temari would have chucked that at his head hard.

"Do it your fucking self!" slamming her door right in his face

Temari was seeing red. Her brothers were inconsiderate assholes! She agreed to pull her weight on raising Izumi but so did her brothers! Now both expect her to give up her life so she could play mom. She didn't mind babysitting when her brother had to work, but she would also like to go out at least once in her damn life! Temari blasts her music at full volume and completely ignores Kankuro and Izumi. She grabs her pillow and screams all her frustrations into it. Tears of anger began to blur her vision.

She lets a few tears fall before she quickly wipes them away. She lies back on her bed, clutching her pillow, and stares at the ceiling. God she hated her life so much at the moment.

About an hour later Temari has calm down. She turns off her music but doesn't leave her room. She decides to call Sakura; this girl always has a way of making her feel better.

"_Thank God you called. Save me!"_

"Um why?"

"_Sasuke is outside my house!"_

"That's not a stalker at all. I'm beginning to think he's obsessed with you."

"_Maybe if I ignore him he'll go away."_

"How long have you been telling yourself that?"

"_The past 15 minutes."_

"Where are you parents?"

"_Out"_

"That sucks."

"_Save me please!"_

"I'll see what I can do."

"_Thank you!"_

Temari hangs up continues to lie in bed. She wasn't quite ready to face her brother yet. She sighs, why did her life have to be complicated. Apparently wanting to be normal was just asking too much. Since Sakura did help her forget about the horrible events of yesterday, saving her from Sasuke was the least she could do. With that in mind she gets up and leaves her room.

She finds her brother and niece sitting on the couch ready to go but were watching Sesame Street instead. Temari is the first to speak. "We need to pick up Sakura."

"Why she has a car. Tell her to come get you."

"She's having some umm boy trouble."

Kankuro turns to look at her "and that means?"

"Look some guy won't leave her alone and he's standing outside her house. So we have to go save her."

"You sure pick some weird friends." Kankuro stands and turns off the TV "fine we'll take her but we're still buying food. So hurry up and get ready."

Temari is quick to change into some black shorts, a red shirt, and her new black and red Jordon's. Kankuro went ahead to put Izumi in her car seat, seeing how sometimes that can take 10 minutes. Temari locks up the apartment and joins her brother and niece in the car. The car ride to Sakura's was quiet but luckily the radio playing prevented the silence from being tense.

When they arrived Kankuro honked to announce she better hurry or he's leaving. Sakura walked out her house and calmly walked to the car. When Sakura got settled in the car Kankuro turns to Temari, "I thought you said some dude was stalking her?"

Temari turns around to face Sakura "what happened to Uchiha?"

Sakura laughs nervously "I'll tell you later."

The ride to the grocery store was filled with Sakura baby talking to Izumi. Izumi was fascinated with Sakura's hair, so she always made attempts to pull at it. Sakura always managed to evade her little chubby hands but Izumi was persistent, that she inherited from her aunty Temari. Arriving at the grocery store, Izumi was placed in the cart and the girls went in one direction while Kankuro went to another.

Sakura wanting to become a nurse, and being a health nut, was picking all the fruits and vegetables for the Sabaku family. Fruits Temari could handle but vegetables? That was just plain gross. The only reason they bought any was Izumi seemed to like them. In fact she preferred them over fruit. Temari's not really sure where Izumi got that from. Neither she nor her brothers are big fans of veggies.

Sakura was enjoying this too much. Telling Temari that see needed to eat better and that her metabolism wasn't going to work so fast forever.

"The day my metabolism stops working at full power and I notice a gut forming then I'll change my ways."

Sakura shakes her head "you're supposed to prevent that from happening. Not start once the problem begins."

"Save the lecture nurse Sakura. I'm aware of the dangers and blah blah."

"Fine but when you're 40 pounds overweight don't come crying to me."

"Please I'm going to be too busy chasing Izumi around for another good 10 years before she becomes an angry teen like the rest of us."

"Ok I'll give you that one."

"Score one for me. High five." Izumi didn't high five right away, but when Temari pouted Izumi laughs and gives her aunt a high five.

Kankuro returned with junk food like chips and cookies before he was off again. Mostly likely to get more unhealthy snacks that Sakura didn't approve of. Sakura shakes her head "if it wasn't for me you guys wouldn't have a single healthy thing in your apartment."

"Hey I learned to make Mac n Cheese didn't I?"

"Which was a miracle."

"Bite me pinky."

The girls continue to the canned food. There Temari put in Texas Ranch style beans and soup that Izumi likes. Of course Sakura criticized almost everything Temari put in the cart. Temari would roll her eyes and say Sakura wouldn't get candy at the end of the trip. They were getting more boxes of Mac n Cheese when Temari decided to tell Sakura what happened earlier.

"I swear I was ready to strangle him to death. I have never been more furious in my life."

Sakura gives her a quick hug "You should have called me sooner. I would have ran Sasuke over to get to you."

Temari cracks a smile "you would commit murder for me?"

"Who said anything about murder? Nothing a few days in the hospital won't fix."

"One day I'm going to see you on America's Most Wanted for trying to murder Sasuke with a deranged weapon."

"And you'll be my accomplice." Sakura winks

Temari puts a pack of tortillas in the cart. "I see don't see how a supposed genius came up with the idea that I was a mom."

"Well let's break it down from his point of view. You started attending out school junior year. Ino made that comment of you being ahem thick when she first met you. You don't go out often because you always happen to be babysitting. Then Sasuke has a phone call with a toddle. So hypothetically you spend your freshman year in love with the baby daddy or whatever. Get pregnant either the ends of freshman year or beginning or sophomore year. Give or take a month or two for day of conception. Gave birth sometime during sophomore year, and then spent the ends of sophomore year raising a baby. When the rest of the kids at your old school called you mean names and what not, you moved here. That fat comment would translate to you still having baby fat. It makes sense why you don't go out and why you're always babysitting. Finally how Sasuke ended up talking to Izumi on the phone. So in the end Izumi is your daughter you know if my math is correct."

Izumi throws her hands in the air "yay!"

Sakura laughs "Izumi doesn't have a problem with that."

Temari face palms "men are idiots."

"That they are."

"Anyway you never did tell me how you got Sasuke to leave your house."

"I told him that if he was there to demand another date that I would personally make sure he never had kids in the future."

"There goes your chance of having a family."

Sakura gives Temari a dirty look. Temari laughs "sorry but you had to know that was coming."

"Anyway then he said that he just wanted to talk. That and he wanted me to pass a message to you."

"Me?"

"Shikamaru says he would like to apologize and if you would do him the honor of coming to the park with me. So that he may apologize for what he said."

"No way Sasuke said that."

"Not in so many words but that's not the point."

Temari sighs "I don't know I'm still not in the best mood."

Sakura pats her shoulder "it's alright I understand. I'll just tell Shikamaru you had a family matter to take care of."

"Thanks Sakura."

The next stop was grabbing some cereal. By the time the girls got to the cereal Izumi wanted out of the shopping cart. She made many attempts on getting off by herself but Temari was always quick to sit her back down. When Izumi's eyes began to water and her bottom lip stuck out, is when Temari let Izumi off the cart. Kankuro had come back from grabbing more goodies and other necessities.

Now that she had freedom Izumi ran down the cereal aisle with Temari walking behind her. With his daughter and sister gone, Kankuro asked Sakura for advice about Temari. Sakura understanding the situation took pity on Kankuro but not a lot.

"Look you can't baby her forever. It's also not fair that you always have her babysit even when there's no good reason. You're lucky she isn't the typical teenage girl otherwise she would have snuck out and done so many bad things just to get back at you."

Kankuro frowns but knows there is truth behind what she said. He sighs he just has the worst luck with women. Sakura smiles softly and pats his arm. "I know you're looking out for her but you have to let her have some fun. I don't mean parties or sleeping around. A simple trip to the movies or just shopping at the mall _without _Izumi at her hip is just fine."

Kankuro grumbles under his breath and Sakura smiles. It looked like Kankuro was making progress.

Temari was walking slowly behind Izumi, to give the toddle the impression she was outrunning her aunt. Then Izumi stops near another cart. She squats and covers her eyes all while giggling. Temari smiles and pretends she can't see her.

"Izumi where are you? Izumi…Izumi where are you?" Temari walks a little further down the aisle still pretending to look for her. Temari turns around and walks back. She stops in front of Izumi but has her back to her.

Izumi stands throwing her hands into the air "boo!"

Temari turns around and tickles her stomach "boo!"

Izumi erupts in laughter and giggles. Temari laughs too and picks her up. She didn't notice a woman watching their performance until she spoke.

"What an adorable child."

Temari looks to her left to spot a woman in her late thirties with long dark hair and brown eyes. She smiles slightly "this is my niece Izumi. Say hi Izumi."

Seeing her aunt being friendly with the lady, Izumi smiles "hi!"

The woman grins "absolutely precious."

"Let's go you little monster before your dad has a panic attack." Temari waves at the lady "say bye."

"Bye!"

The woman laughs and waves goodbye. Temari walks away a few steps when the woman yells out "nice to see you again dear!"

Temari stops in her tracks and turns around. The woman had turned the corner and walked away. Temari was confused. Had she met that lady before? She couldn't remember. Although for some reason her mind was telling her she should have known the lady. Thinking the lady mistaken her for someone else, Temari walks back to her brother and friend.

Getting all their groceries, paying, and loading them in the car they were back on the road. Kankuro agreed to drive Sakura to the park. When they arrived Sakura thanked him and got out. Temari waves from the window and waits for her brother to drive away. He didn't.

"Aren't we going home?"

Kankuro takes a deep breath. "Why don't you hang out with Sakura today? It's a Saturday."

Temari blinks "what?"

Kankuro takes out a 20 and gives it to her. "Give this to a hobo or by pot from a friend or something. Just go do something fun."

She stares at the money and looks at her brother in confusion. "Did you just tell me to buy drugs?"

"Get out."

Still thinking her brother wasn't serious, Temari steps out the car. The second she shuts the door Kankuro drives off. Temari stood there for a few seconds watching her brother drive away before she fully understood what happened. He brother, the overprotective one, just let her have a day to hang out…..when the hell did he change his mind? Not wanting to jinx herself she runs to catch up to Sakura.

Sakura was thrilled that Kankuro let Temari stay. Now she had a witness or an accomplice if something went bad with Sasuke. The guys were quick on getting to the park. When they approached the girls it was tense and awkward.

Sakura clasps her hands together "sooo"

"We need to talk Sakura."

She sighs "fine let's get this over with." She turns to Temari "pray that I don't kill him."

Temari rolls her eyes "you'll be fine." The stoic guy and short tempered girl walk away. Now it was just the lazy guy and the supposed teen mom left. Temari wasn't looking forward to this at all. Though she thought it was better to get the story straight before any nasty rumors spread.

"I think we need to clear some things up."

Shikamaru blushes "look I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get into your business. I understand why you wouldn't want people know. I'm sorry alright? Just stop avoiding me woman."

"I'm only going to say this once. Izumi isn't my child. She's my niece. I'm an aunt not a mother. My cherry has yet to be popped by anyone."

Shikamaru's face turns a darker shade of red. Clearly embarrassed he turns his back to her. Temari sighs and sits on the ground. Not caring about the dirt or twigs. She begins to poke the dirt with a stick. After a few minutes she feels Shikamaru sit next to her.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing already. You didn't know. The only one who does is Sakura."

"Still I shouldn't have assumed that."

"Whatever."

"You're still mad."

"Excuse me for not being forgiving at the moment. I'm apparently a whore for someone to think I have a child at my age."

"I didn't-"

"You didn't have too" Temari snaps. She breaks the stick into smaller pieces to calm her anger. She sighs, really being a teenager sucked. This isn't the way she imagined herself in her teen years. Then again she never imagined Kankuro being a dad ever in his life. Soon Gaara is going to end up engaged…..for some reason that thought was mildly disturbing. She has the weirdest brothers on the planet.

"Do you want corn?"

What the…?

Temari looks at Shikamaru strangely "corn?"

He blushes and looks away "never mind."

Today was just a weird day. First Kankuro lets her actually hang out with Sakura then Shikamaru asks if she wants corn. Honestly could anything weirder happen today? Hearing a horn go off with the chime of bells, Temari looks to see a man pushing a cart full of goodies. Oh that kind of corn. Wait…corn! Temari grins "Sakura corn!"

The guys have never seen Sakura run so fast. She was a pink blur. Sakura kindly spots the man before turning to her friend and yelling "Temari hurry up and translate!"

Temari rolls her eyes and makes her way slowly to her impatient friend. Sakura and Temari both got corn on a stick and got the guys each a bag of chips with lemon and chili. They also got plenty of napkins. The guys of course paid for the snacks the girls didn't mind. They were too busy enjoying their corn or elote, its proper name.

"What is all of that?" Sasuke asks

"It's covered in mayo then you add some cheese, chili powder, a little salt, and finally lime juice. I guess you guys would call it corn on a cob." Temari explains

Sakura's eyes were sparking as she was enjoying her elote. Sasuke and Shikamaru were slightly disturbed. "That doesn't look appetizing at all."

"Taste and be amazed." Sakura holds her corn out for Sasuke to try.

"I rather not."

"Fine don't eat something delicious."

Temari looks at Shikamaru "um do you want to try?"

"Do I get yelled at if I do?"

"Promise I won't."

He takes a bite out of the corn. After chewing and wiping his mouth he shrugs. "Not bad."

"See that Sasuke he liked it. So stop being a baby and try it." Sakura by now was putting the corn in Sasuke's face.

"Sakura stop it."

"Then taste the damn thing!"

"No!"

"Stop being stubborn!"

"I don't want to taste it!"

Shikamaru and Temari sat back and enjoyed the show. They ended up sharing the elote. Sakura in the end did get Sasuke to taste the elote. He didn't enjoy any of it but was forced to swallow since Sakura was glaring daggers at him. After that snack break Sasuke dragged Sakura away to finish their talk. Shikamaru and Temari continued to sit next to eat other.

"I want to tell you something."

Temari rolls her eyes "if this is about earlier then don't. If you apologize again I'm going to punch you."

"I just want to talk. I would like if you didn't say anything until I finished talking."

"You have my attention."

"I initially didn't think you had a child. It wasn't until Sasuke brought it up. He said some things that got me thinking. I know it wasn't the smartest thing to do. I assumed to quickly and made an idiot out of myself. I can't say how sorry I am but I do want to let you know I'm sorry. So it would be nice if you didn't avoid me at school or my phone calls."

"To be fair I avoided everyone yesterday and I almost did the same thing today."

"Um so are we ok?"

"I can't be mad forever. Plus it was sweet when you said you wouldn't judge me when you thought I had a child. Even though I don't but knowing you would still be my friend, well thanks."

"I guess a person would do a lot when they really like someone."

It was Temari's turn to blush a dark red. Today seemed like National Shikamaru blushes day. He's been doing that a lot for the past two days. Temari laughs nervously "ya I guess they would."

Shikamaru decides to take a chance, he takes deep breath, and starts' talking before his brain suddenly chooses to chicken out. "If we're still ok then maybe you would like to go out sometime? You know to make up for this big mess. We can go somewhere that is kid friendly if you have to babysit."

Temari is shocked "you would be ok with Izumi being the third wheel?"

"I wouldn't mind. The way I see it I'm going to have to be on her good side if I want your brother to like me."

She was speechless. A guy didn't mind having a kid on a date. This day just wouldn't stop surprising her. She didn't know if she should cry out in joy or run away from this bizarre day. She chose neither. She smiled slightly the blush still present on her cheeks. "That sounds good to me."

Shikamaru relaxes "great."

They continued to sit and talked about random things. They waited for Sasuke and Sakura to be finished with their talk. They waited... waited…. and waited…..

There wasn't a rush just they took a really long time to finish their talk. If they were even talking at this point, Temari figured Sakura finally took Sasuke out and was trying to hide the body. She was proven wrong when about an hour later Sasuke and Sakura came back.

Sakura's eyes were puffy and red while Sasuke's face had a nice red slap mark. Shikamaru and Temari were smart enough to know not to ask. Instead the boys offered the girls a ride home. Sasuke took Sakura home while Temari rode with Shikamaru.

When they arrived Shikamaru walked Temari to her door. Scratching the back of his head, blushing, he smiles "so I'll see you later?"

"Might be sooner than you think."

This was a good way to end the day. Everything was cleared up. She wasn't a teen mom in his eyes anymore. Her brother through his strange behavior let her go out. It might have been an extremely bizarre day but at least it ended on a good note…..until the door swung open.

"What the hell! I said you could go to the park to have fun! Not come back with a boyfriend! Who the hell is this!?"

Nope. God or some higher being just couldn't let her have this normal ending. Her life just couldn't be normal. It wasn't meant to be normal. Temari pushes her brother back inside the apartment. She waves goodbye before shutting the door. Saving herself and Shikamaru further embarrassment from her idiot brother.

Her life might not be normal or exciting but she wouldn't trade it for anything. She was considering trading her brother though, that she wouldn't mind changing.

**My God this chapter was just as long as the last. I was going to make this a two shot but then my brain thought of an idea for another chapter….damn you brain and you're never ending ideas! Haha so I think I'm going to add one last chapter to this. Let me know what you guys thought! Thanks for reading and please review! :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm back! College, especially Bio is kicking my butt :P Hello everyone. I want to thank everyone who has reviewed, favored, and followed. You are all amazing and I'm glad so many of you like it. Hopefully this is the last chapter but I wouldn't be surprised if my evil brain decided to come up with another idea. So here is (hopefully) the last chapter of I'm Not a Teen Mom. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I own the cereal I bought at the store yesterday but I don't own Naruto.**

It's always a little embarrassing to tell a parent figure a boy asked you out on a date. Mothers would mostly likely squeal and start asking a bunch of questions, 'what's his name' 'what's he like' etc. Fathers most likely would ask 'where does he live?' 'What does he want?' and finally 'where the hell is my shotgun?'

Temari had a combination of both minus the squealing part…..her brothers were not happy.

"I want to know his name, address, if he has any criminal background. If he sneezes I want to know about it!" Temari expected this from Kankuro.

Gaara simply was on his phone. At first Temari thought Gaara was on her side. She was proven wrong when Kankuro asked why he wasn't concerned about the "perverted boy who asked out our sister?!"

Gaara's response "I'm shopping for a gun."

Temari just wanted to crawl in a hole and never come out. She tried counting to ten to calm herself but that didn't do much good. Instead she locked herself in her room again. This method seemed to get more of a reaction instead of screaming at her idiot brothers.

So here she was sitting on her bed browsing the internet. Her door was locked, Izumi was content sipping her milk next to her mother figure, and her brothers were trying to convince her to come out. Temari allowed Izumi in this time because she wasn't the one at fault. Her idiot overprotective brothers just couldn't let her grow up.

After about an hour Temari figured her brothers were ready to talk. She turns off her computer, picks up Izumi and walks out her room. Kankuro and Gaara were sitting on the couch sulking. Well Kankuro looked like he was sulking; you wouldn't be able to tell if Gaara was since he had on a poker face. Temari knew her brothers like the back of her hand; both were sulking and felt bad.

Temari let Izumi down and the little girl went and climbed onto her father's lap. Kankuro smiled at his little monster and Gaara ruffled her hair. Temari sighs and sits on the ground facing her brothers.

"Can we talk maturely about this?"

"I promise nothing but I will try." Gaara agreed with Kankuro.

Knowing this was the only opportunity to have a serious talk with her brothers, she took it. "Ok first I am going on this date. Second you can't threaten his life in any way, shape, or form. Third if I am left to babysit I will kill you both slowly in your sleep. Understood?"

"Threatening the guy comes in our job description as being your brothers and legal guardian." Kankuro pointed at himself when he said legal guardian.

Temari groans and throws her hands in the air in surrender, "fine but nothing rash. That means no buying guns. Got it Gaara?"

"Fine"

"Thank you."

"We won't do anything crazy on one condition."

"What?" Temari didn't like the look on Kankuro's face.

"You have your date here."

"What kind of condition is that?!"

"A damn good one!"

"That is our compromise." Gaara crosses his arms.

Temari couldn't believe her brothers. She was ready to commit murder. Instead she glares at her brothers. "Normal families don't meet the boyfriend until after a few dates."

"Tough, we ain't normal."

"That's not a word!"

"It is in my book."

"Why me?" Temari couldn't help but ask out loud.

"Because we have to make sure this guy isn't just after one thing. No matter what you're our baby sister. We have to protect the baby of the family."

Temari couldn't fight that. No matter how much she wanted to she couldn't. After their parents died a few years ago, Temari and her brothers became extremely close. She couldn't win against the "baby of the family" card. Well Temari figured she might as well accept this win/defeat. She gets to go on the date but has to be at home with her brothers and niece…

Just freaking perfect.

It's been two weeks since the whole "the guy I like thinks I'm a teen mom" and "my best friend's strange relationship with duck shaped hair emo dude is slowly falling into place" happened. Izumi's birthday was about 2 and a half months away and nothing solid has been planned yet. Currently Temari and Sakura were at the mall eating food and trying to come up with a birthday plan for the special almost two year old.

"Why don't you guys rent Elmo for the day?"

"Have you seen those costumes? Freaking Elmo looks like a serial killer."

"Cookie monster?"

"Her favorite character is Elmo not Cookie monster."

"Who knew toddlers could be so picky." Sakura nibbles on a French fry.

Temari rolls her eyes, "tell me about it."

They spent the remainder of the afternoon coming up with ideas and then shooting down those ideas. In the end Temari figured they would just order pizza, a cake, and find some park tables and just celebrate at the park. It would be an extremely small party. The family, Sakura, and a few of Kankuro's friends would be attending. Sakura still insisted on Elmo coming, until Temari showed her the picture and Sakura was quick to change her mind.

Their next topic soon became about the boys in their lives. Temari just finished telling Sakura her compromise with her brothers. Surprisingly Sakura didn't bust out laughing. She looked more surprised than anything.

"Hey you might have lost the battle but you still haven't lost the war."

"Meaning?"

"At least you get to go on the date. Granted if Shikamaru agrees which I know for a fact he will."

"Thank you detective. Anyway how are things with stalker boy?"

"Fine I guess. We're taking baby steps which is good."

"Now we know why no guy has dared to ask you out. Well if they did they "mysteriously" didn't want a second date."

Sakura pouts "the asshole."

"I hear wedding bells."

Sakura groans and places her head on the table. "Please do not joke about that."

"Touchy subject ok moving on."

"So when are you going to tell Shikamaru about the date?"

"Most likely tomorrow when I go to his house so he can help me with calculus."

"Your brothers are letting you go?" Sakura asked in disbelief

"I told them I would be studying with you."

"You're a great role model for Izumi."

Temari shrugs while smirking. "Hey what they don't know won't hurt them."

The next day at school went by fast. Shikamaru gave Temari a lift to his house. His house was two stories and was painted white with some light blue. They entered his house and Temari whistled. "Nice place."

"Thanks make yourself comfortable." They would be studying calculus in the living room. Temari dropped her backpack on the floor and plopped onto the couch. Shikamaru also dropped his bag on the floor and walked into what Temari assumed was the kitchen. Waiting for her tutor to come back Temari scanned the living room.

She spotted some pictures hanging on the wall to her left. Curiosity got the best of her so she stood and walked over to the wall. The first picture looked like a family portrait. A woman who Temari assumed was his mom stood in the middle, Shikamaru stood to her left, and his dad stood on the right. Temari kept staring at the woman…..she's seen her somewhere before…

Her mouth fell open that was the lady who said hi to her at the grocery store! She saw Shikamaru's mom at the store and she didn't recognize her! "Great she probably thinks I'm a rude ass person."

"Who does?"

Temari jumped up in surprise. She turns and hits Shikamaru "don't scare me like that."

"My house I can do what I want."

Temari rolls her eyes and turns back to stare at the picture. Shikamaru follows her gaze, "I see you've met my family."

"I saw your mom at the store."

"Whatever she said I'm sorry and ignore it."

"All she said was hi and Izumi was adorable."

"So why would she think you were being rude?"

"I didn't know who she was but she clearly knew who I was…..she probably thinks I'm a bitch."

"No she doesn't. My mom has a habit of knowing people who don't know her."

Temari groans "I don't want to talk about this anymore. My first impression meeting your mother and it was a crappy one."

"Want to work on calculus then?"

"I suppose."

They spent about two hours working on their homework. Afterwards they just talked about everything and nothing while snacking on some chips. Shikamaru's parents still weren't home and would still be out for a few more hours. Shikamaru took this time to ask Temari about a possible date.

"I figured you would want me to do something productive this weekend….I was wondering if we could go out on Saturday," he looks away to hide his growing blush. "If you're free."

Temari was dreading this moment. She didn't know how to tell him about her compromise with her brothers…..well here goes nothing.

"About that…" She begins to fidget with the ends of her shirt. Crap she couldn't find a very good way to end that sentence.

Shikamaru frowns "you changed your mind."

"No! I mean it's not that," Temari lets out a frustrated sigh. "I had to make a deal with my brothers."

"Whatever they want I'll do it."

"You don't even know what it is yet."

"Then tell me."

Temari takes a deep breath "the date has to be at my house."

Shikamaru shrugs "ok."

Temari just stared at him. At first she didn't think she heard him right. After looking at his serious face and also trying not to blush while staring into his eyes. She couldn't believe him. "That's it?"

"Honestly I thought I would go through worst."

"I don't have a response."

Shikamaru smiles "how about I'll see you at 6 on Saturday."

The week flew by for Temari. She didn't really concentrate in class and her homework was mostly bs. She couldn't help it. Normally didn't have a lot of girly moments, but she would make an exception. She was having her first date! Sakura could see the extra shine in her friend's eye and wasn't shy with the teasing.

Temari had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep the smile from surfacing all week. She wasn't aware that Shikamaru was having the same feelings. The guys were not shy from teasing him as well. When Saturday finally came Temari was jumping mentally from excitement and nerves.

Currently she was in her room with Izumi. Fresh out of the shower and only dressed in her underwear and bra, Temari was going through her closet to find the perfect outfit. While she was throwing her clothes around, Izumi was content with playing her toys. The toy lit up and an animal would pop up whenever she pushed, pulled, or twisted a button.

Temari settled for a nice sky blue shirt but couldn't decide whether or not to wear pants or a skirt. Not having her mother around made these moments difficult. Even when her mother was still around Temari wasn't a big girly girl. Wanting to impress but didn't want to seem like a whore on the first date was crucial. The jeans clung to her in all the right places and made her butt look awesome, but the skirt showed off her long legs…..why was being a girl so difficult!?

She could call Sakura and ask her opinion but she wasn't in the mood for squealing and teasing. Her nerves were getting the best of her already. So what's a girl to do when she needs a little fashion advice?

Ask her almost two year old niece.

Temari stood in front of Izumi holding skinny jeans in one hand and a mini skirt in the other. "Izumi"

Said child looks up from her toy.

Looking in the eyes of her niece Temari shares her predicament. "I know you inherited my brains, I need your help. Should I wear skinny jeans that hug my legs in all the right places or this skirt that shows off my legs?"

Any normal child would ignore the question and continue to play, but Izumi was anything but normal. Izumi looked back and forth between the jeans and skirt. Her eyebrows furrowed together and her face scrunched up a little bit, this was her thinking face.

Temari ignored the fact that Izumi looked a lot like her mother when she made that face. Instead she waited patiently for her niece's decision. After a few moments Izumi pointed to the jeans then her attention returned to her toy. Satisfied with Izumi's judgment Temari quickly changes into her outfit.

Looking in the mirror Temari decided to let her hair down. She ran the brush through it a few times to tame it. Again Temari wasn't a big girly girl so she wasn't sure if she should wear makeup or not. While she didn't want Shikamaru to get the impression she would become someone like Ino, but she did want to dress up to impress him. After an internal struggle Temari figured a little mascara and eyeliner wouldn't hurt.

Of course this was the first time applying this stuff by herself. The last time she wore makeup she let Sakura handle that. Temari takes a deep breath then picks up the eyeliner.

Alright this shouldn't be too difficult….

It's a good thing she started getting ready at four.

Izumi was extremely curious as to what her aunty was putting on her face. She wondered why her aunt would put some on, glare at her reflection, and then wipe if off just to start all over again. Izumi really wanted to copy her aunt. She left her toy and made her way to her aunt's dresser. She stood on her tippy toes and managed to snag something.

She looked at the tube she grabbed and looked up at her aunt. She then proceeded to rub the tube on her eye. Of course nothing came out but Izumi certainly thought she was doing just what her aunt was doing. Mimicking her aunty was fun. Rub the tub over her eye, use her free hand to wipe off and start all over. Once Izumi got bored with copying her aunt she kept the tube and walked back to her toy.

After much struggle Temari was finally done and satisfied with how the makeup turned out. She took a quick picture to show Sakura later. Now for the finishing touches. Apply deodorant, check. A dash of perfume to smell nice, check. Spray a small amount of Izumi so she won't cry, done. Flats on, double check. Now where the hell is her chap stick/lip gloss thingy that makes her lips shine a little?

Temari began lifting and moving everything on her dresser trying to find her chap stick. Izumi was oblivious to her aunt's mini panic mode and continued to play with her toy while holding onto the tube tightly. A few knocks where heard a small bang and Temari cursing under her breath. Finally Izumi turns to stare at her aunty. Tilting her head to the side Izumi wondered why her aunt was making a mess in the room.

Izumi looks down at the tube in her hand. Was she looking for this? Then three knocks where heard from the front door. The room got real quiet and that's when Temari had a full blown nervous breakdown.

"Where the hell is it?" her search turned frantic. She was not going on this date, even if it was in her own home, with chapped lips! Why is it when you really need something it just freaking disappears on you?! It took all her will power not to pull at her hair or scream in frustration. Izumi began to worry about her aunt. "Mama?"

Temari takes a few deep breaths. Ok this was not the time to freak out….thank God for the invention of deodorant. She straightens her clothes, hair, and double checks her makeup in the mirror. Izumi tugs at her shirt. Temari looks down to see Izumi holding out her chap stick/lip gloss.

"You little punk when did you get that?"

Izumi just smiles knowing she had the object her aunt was looking for. Temari applies the Chap Stick and daps a little on Izumi. Temari does a 360 "what do you think."

Izumi claps "petty!"

"And you're pretty too."

With a final deep breath to calm her nerves, Temari steps out her room. Kankuro was busy glaring at Shikamaru would stool calmly at the door. Both look to see Temari step out of her room, and both their mouths fall wide open.

Temari started to panic. _"I look like a clown. God dammit! I knew wearing makeup was a stupid idea! I'm sooo stupid!"_

Kankuro was the first to recover. "Your hair is down."

Temari manages to relax and tries not to snap at her brother. The key word being tries. "This isn't the first time you've seen my hair down."

"Well excuse me for not seeing your hair down in years."

"Not excused."

Shikamaru coughs and successfully gets the bickering siblings attention. "You look beautiful." Temari couldn't fight the blush that now covers her cheeks. This was a rare moment when a guy that wasn't her brother or someone just wanting to get into her pants, said she looked beautiful. Plus it was also cute seeing Shikamaru blushing and how he found the floor very interesting after he said the complement.

Kankuro didn't skip a beat going into protective brother mode. "Now listen here you punk-"

Izumi runs out of her aunt's room. Stopping in front of her dad she smiles up at him and throws her arms in the air. "Petty!"

Kankuro's anger quickly fades as he smiles softly at his daughter. He picks her up and tickles her stomach. "You are very pretty."

Izumi erupts in giggles and wraps her arms around her father's neck. Giving him a tight hug that caused Kankuro to choke a bit, his little girl didn't know her own strength.

The date was set back into motion. The plan was to go eat some pizza and then rent a movie to watch back at home. Gaara was going to meet them at the pizza place. Kankuro drove his daughter, sister, and the boy he really wanted to run over to the pizza place. When they arrived Gaara was already sitting at a table.

Kankuro made sure Shikamaru sat next to Gaara while he sat next to Temari. Izumi sat in a high chair watching all the glaring her dad and uncle were giving to the unknown man. Temari couldn't help but sigh; this wasn't at all what she thought her first date was going to be like. Shikamaru didn't seem to mind. He was calm, almost too calm for someone in his position.

Luckily Gaara was a bit more reserved when it came to comments about people. Kankuro on the other hand….

"If I see even a dent in your pants I will not hesitate to run you over with my car. And you don't want to know what Gaara would do."

Temari buries her face in her hands. Oh God this couldn't get worse.

"If you managed to survive the car then I would have your manhood removed."

Great! Now Gaara is openly threatening him too! Her face was the same color as a tomato, she just knew it. One day. She couldn't have one normal day. This was a date for crying out loud! Why did the high beings somewhere in the universe think it was hilarious to make her life miserable? Well might as well help Shikamaru in some way.

Temari gave a quick kick to Gaara's shin. He didn't show it hurt but Temari saw him flinch. Next Temari pinched Kankuro's thigh really hard. Kankuro bit back the yell that was on the tip of his tongue. Izumi had no idea what was going on. She just knew she didn't like that she wasn't having any attention. While her family were glaring and hitting each other with the unknown man watching, Izumi was in the process of removing her sandal.

Once it was off she proceeded to throw it at her uncle Gaara. It hit him right on the side of the face. Izumi pleased with herself laughs loudly and covers her face. As if she was trying to hide the fact she threw her sandal. Gaara blinks and takes a moment to register what happened.

He gives his brother an annoyed look. "You need to buy her tennis shoes. Sandals are now her weapon if she keeps throwing them."

"She doesn't like tennis shoes. She barely likes sandals!"

"Are you going to let a two year old dictate your life?"

Temari glad the tension was off of Shikamaru she joins the conversation. "Please Gaara. Izumi has him wrapped around her little finger."

Kankuro crosses his arms "shut up. She has us all wrapped around her finger."

The pizza finally arrived. Everyone dug in. With their mouths stuffed Temari was glad they couldn't harass Shikamaru. Of course when the pizza was gone they began their interrogation. They started off with easy questions.

"How's school?" "Going to college?"

Then the inevitable happened.

"Are you a virgin?" "Any STD's?" "Knock someone up lately?"

Shikamaru didn't flinch or stutter with his responses. He was blushing yes but that was to be expected from the inappropriate questions her brothers were asking him. Her brothers seemed satisfied with his answers. Temari couldn't be more thankful when Kankuro stood up and said, "Well I need to take a leak." Then a few seconds later Gaara stood up to take a phone call. Most likely the girl he's been dating called him. Izumi was still busy eating her pizza.

"I wouldn't blame you if you leave."

Shikamaru looks at Temari in surprise. "Why would I leave?"

Temari groans "this is the worst date in the history of dates. My brothers are harassing you. Really any normal guy would be long gone by now."

Shikamaru smiles and grabs her hand from across the table. "I guess I'm not normal then."

Temari couldn't help but smile "I guess not."

"No matter how troublesome this is, I really like you. You're brothers will have to get use to that."

An employee came by to refill their drinks. In her eyes she sees a cute couple holding hands smiling while a little girl is entertaining herself by playing with her pizza. The waitress smiles "what an adorable daughter you two have."

Temari was use to these comments and didn't hesitate to say "thank you."

It was only after Izumi dropped her pizza on the floor and said "uh oh" did Temari and Shikamaru realize what happened. The waitress thought…..

Temari and Shikamaru both flush a deep red but didn't let go of each other's hands. Not until Kankuro came back and saw his little sister holding hands with a boy.

"Hands off per- oh Izumi you dropped your pizza."

Shikamaru gives a small squeeze before letting go of Temari's hand. Once Izumi was cleaned up and Gaara finished his phone call, they went and rented a movie. The drive back to the apartment was silent but it wasn't uncomfortable.

Reaching the apartment the first thing Izumi did was demand that her aunty take off her sandals. With her sandals off Izumi scrambled onto the couch and sat next to Shikamaru. Kankuro set up the movie and Gaara sat on the opposite couch. Temari sat on the other side of Shikamaru and Kankuro joined his brother on the other couch. They decided to rent Mama.

Half way into the movie Izumi began to get bored with the movie. She positions herself sitting upside down. Her feet at up against the wall and she's trying to find something to entertain herself with. She turns to look at the unknown man still in her home. She notices how close he's sitting with his aunty.

She didn't know who this person was but if her aunty liked him then he must be a fun person. Izumi figured he would play with her. So she takes her right foot and places it on his face. Shikamaru saw movement from the corner of his eye but didn't know what it was until a small foot blocked his vision from the movie.

Not knowing what exactly to do, he gently pushes the foot away from his face. Not a second later the foot returns and Izumi giggles. Shikamaru smiles at the child's antics and pushes the foot away again. This game continued for another few minutes and Temari managed to take a picture. Having enough feet in his face for the day, Shikamaru grabs Izumi's foot and tickles it. She screams in laugher and quickly runs to the safety of the other couch with her father and uncle.

Until the movie finished Izumi would go and mess with Shikamaru. Poking him, pulling his hair, or giving him toys. The ultimate sign that Izumi was comfortable with someone was hitting. So when Izumi stood next to Shikamaru and slapped him, this was her way of approving him. Kankuro busts out laughing, Gaara smirks and Temari couldn't help but laugh at Shikamaru's shocked expression.

When the movie ended Kankuro and Gaara figured they would give the teens a few moments alone. Temari and Shikamaru went outside as she walked him to his car.

"Well I hope my crazy dysfunction family wasn't too much for you."

Shikamaru shakes his head. "No but I have to say I didn't think toddles could hit so hard."

Temari smiles proudly "that's my niece."

"Maybe we can reframe her from hitting me next time."

Temari pats his arm "sadly that won't happen."

Shikamaru chuckles "that's fine. At least I know she likes me."

They stood in silence for a few moments. Shikamaru grabs her hand and places a kiss on it. "I enjoyed myself. I hope we can see each other again."

Temari fights the rising blush and looks off to the side shyly "I wouldn't mind."

Shikamaru smiles and feeling bold gives her a quick peck on the lips. "Great. I'll see you on Monday."

Knowing her brothers witnessed that Temari says a quick good bye and walks back to her apartment. She felt like she was on cloud nine. The date in her opinion was terrible but Shikamaru didn't care and wanted to see her again. Now to finish the night on a good note she needed to lecture her brothers.

"Who said you could spy!?"

"We weren't spying!"

"Oh right and I'm not a blond!"

"Ahhhh!" Izumi always wanted to be included in everything. Even screaming contests.

Her brothers drove her crazy and her niece was absolutely weird most times, but she wouldn't want this date to go any other way. If a boy couldn't handle her family or accept them for who they were then they weren't the right guy for her.

She couldn't wait to see Shikamaru again.

**This just gets longer and longer and longer….my brain won't stop coming up with ideas! Really I think this story is going to become a new multi-chapter story if my brain doesn't stop with the ideas! My brain seems to like putting Naruto characters in different universes. Why is it easy to put them in different situations? Lately my brain has put them in a Pokémon universe, Darker than Black, and my latest being Avatar: The Last Airbender -_-' *sigh* anyway please leave a review! Thanks everyone for reading and have a great day or night depending on time zone!**


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